Saturday, September 22, 2007
Yay for you.
I welcome you to my blog.
I wonder how many readers I have now. Probably one or two. Three if I'm lucky.
It makes me feel like there's no point in blogging anymore, because I'm writing for an audience, not really myself. I've made it a point to myself to get a post in everyday, but what's the use if nobody reads them?
I recall a time, long ago, when people actually cared about my humble blog. They'd always leave a comment, or a drop a message in my shoutbox. And they'd say something to me if I didn't post anything for days. Now, no one cares if the last post was last year's. Comment counts are down to a zero. And I'm leaving messages for myself in my shoutbox just so the older ones move down, which makes me feel better.
And lately, I've made an effort to read the blogs on my links list, and I've left messages in the blogger's shoutboxes and have commented about their posts, just to let them know that "Hey, I'm alive and well, and so is my blog!" Nothing. Absolutely nothing. My cry of existence and for acknowledgment falls on deaf ears.
I'm sorry for sounding this way. I just feel so depressed now, so
unloved. I feel
lonely.
Invisible. I've hardly any company here, and whatever company I used to get on my blog is now gone.
I know this is a just a phase of my life, and that I'll get over it, but this is how I feel now, and I have to say something about it. In the past, I would've never allowed myself to succumb to this level of self-pity, but I've decided to let myself go, so you all know how I feel.
(And I'm sure I've irritated my remaining readers with this post. I'm sorry.)
And I know being lonely is something everyone must learn. I will, in time, but for now, just let me validate my feelings. Just let me purge all this negativity from inside me.
So, now that you know how I truly feel, you may be compelled to do something about it. Well, let me save you the time and trouble, because you don't have to do anything at all. It's too late now.
Heck, you might only be reading this a week after I've posted this. And really, I wouldn't be surprised.
Nevertheless, I want to thank you for sparing some time to come and check up on my latests blogs. And I am deeply sorry if I've offended you with my words, and/or if I've wasted your precious time with my negative rambling.
